If the idea that you can simply invest a little money and make your carbon footprint disappear, that’s because carbon offsets are bullsh…

Bad credits. Bad credits

Making-offsetters-look-bad credits

Like we never had them vetted

Scam credits

No-standard-having credits

Like we don’t know what a ‘carbon asset’ is

So let me break it down, climate change is now

Fossil fuel is what the planet is phasing out

Slowly, transforming glacier-style

Too slow to stop glacier melt

This is just an introduction to emission reduction

Supply chain, every link in production

Get rid of your combustion addiction

Give it up and mitigate the destruction 

While still evading bankruptcy

Keeping your business open with emissions low

Is critical, what’s left in the mix is ‘residual’

The most expensive and difficult emissions

Offsets can help get rid of those

A bridge from low emissions to no emissions has to be

Based on the principle of ‘additionality’

Taking carbon from the atmosphere for a fee  

Makin’ happen what would never happen for free

Offsetters

Makin’ amends

For carbon emissions

Offsetters

Takin’ pollution away

And just makin’ it

All better

Offsetters

Sale of indulgences

Pay for the privilege 

Y’all sinners

Offsetters

Bad credits, bad credits

Improperly-vetted scam credits

Makin’ the cynical apathetic

Makin’ offsets look like a theatrical premise

At best, and at worst an actual menace

Bad credits undermine the whole rationale

Now they say “the checks simply don’t balance out”

Not enough plantable ground to capture each ounce

But the offsetters are not backin’ down

“Sometimes it fails in practice, so let it go!”

It’s all fixable, check the principle

A financial incentive to grow carbon sinks

In the developing world, that is literal gold

Protect a forest, from timber companies

And poachers who would happily wreck it for us

Build a clean energy source

Transform an emitting industry into one that absorbs

“How do we pay for it?” With a carbon market

With enforceable standards so it’s not defrauded

Only true removals get bartered on it

Now watch as total emissions start to plummet

The idea is that an offset should provide an extra reduction of carbon that wouldn’t have happened any other way.

‘Cause stopping pollution

Is harder than moving 

To off-setting

You might wanna hide in 

A cave if you find it 

Too upsetting

If we can cool off 

A planet that’s getting 

Too hot, let us

Don’t try to dismiss it 

As greenwashing, nah

‘Cause it’s all vetted

Offsetters

Makin’ amends

For carbon emissions

Offsetters

Takin’ pollution away

And just makin’ it

All better

Offsetters

Sale of indulgences

Pay for the privilege 

Y’all sinners

Offsetters